Tuesday, October 14, 2008

don't mind if I do

So, I'm on my way back from the gym this morning. I've got my headphones on, listening to Benny Goodman (or Artie Shaw - I don't know them both well enough to know the difference yet) on my iPod, and reading "Bad Money," about how we got into this crazy fiscal mess in the first place. I'm pretty engrossed (so to speak).

Well, I feel one coming on, and it's the open air, and the breeze is blowing, so I let it rip.

In the next second, a scream erupts from behind me (a bloody-murder kind of scream), and this woman makes a wide berth to my left. She's muttering at me and giving me dirty looks. Well, she scared me, maybe more than I scared/offended her. I said, "I'm sorry - but it's just a fart." She muttered more things, and then I took off my headphones and called up the sidewalk to her, where she was speeding along. "Look, I'm sorry, but it's just a fart. It's a bodily function. We all have them."

Then she said, "You have no shame!"

And I said, "You're right. Not about this anyway. It's a bodily imperative. It makes no sense to be ashamed of it." And she gave me a wide berth, and I stalked off.

Now, this is just funny. I certainly shouldn't have gotten so upset, but then again, neither should she. It's a fart!

But it does point up the fact that I'm kinda more tense than I have any real need - or use - to be. I've got plenty of "right" to be - just look around you. But still, I'd like something that silly to not only not get to me so, but to actively make me laugh.

Ha! ;0)


Clifford said...

A lot of people. to avoid public scorn, fart through their mouths. It's kind of a combination between a fart and a belch, colloquially called a 'bart'. You'd do well to learn this charming but archaic art as it's totally acceptible in even the tightest-sphincter crowd.

syzygy13 said...

If so, I guess I better keep some breath mints handy.

Ang said...

Good for you for letting it rip, in more ways than one!

Thanks for this story.

syzygy13 said...

@ang - you're welcome! ;)